People often come to divorce attorneys in a very low state. They feel like a failure and although they are trying to fix something that is essentially broken, their self esteem is minimal. Although they realize they are taking a step to fix something that is broken in their life, they still lack confidence to move forward. They are also missing half of their friends, half of their family, and half of their romantic partnership. In order to keep things civil, they are no longer spending time with some mutual friends. They are suddenly finding themselves alone and with additional free time. If they have kids, they’re finding they suddenly have free time away from the kids because the other parent has to take up some of the responsibility. What to do with all of this free time? We’ve got a few options:
1. Fitness: Nothing says “I’m starting over!” like a new fitness program. Getting out and moving helps pump up the happiness flowing through your veins. From the very wise words of my favorite movie character, Elle Woods, “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don’t shoot their husbands! They just don’t.” These are wise words. You’re full of endorphins, watching your body change for the better, and you’re out making friends. If you’re not into the gym, try one of these fun alternatives:
- Dance Trance (or other dance classes): This is my cup of tea. I love going into a room and knowing that each song has it’s own routine. I like being able to feel like I’m a backup dancer to Miley, Kanye, Beyoncé or Britney. It’s intoxicating to be able to watch yourself get boogie with it. Even if you don’t have rhythm, its fun to be a part of something so fun and where people don’t judge you if you’ve got two left feet. It’s great to go to a place where if you don’t show up, half the class will be checking on you.
- Crossfit: This is one of the biggest work out crazes going on right now. This would happen to be April’s cup of tea. Crossfit has people who normally would’ve “sat that exercise out” wanting to compete against themselves. It’s pushing people to their limits to see what they can personally accomplish. There’s a reason it’s so popular. People want to achieve their personal best. Once they’ve done that, they can compete with others to beat THEIR best. Also, you can joke around about crossfitting people’s faces, but I wouldn’t advise saying that to your ex before the case is settled…
- Running: I’m not necessarily talking about marathon running. With the 5k’s having every theme imaginable these days, you can do a Couch 2 5k program and be ready to hit the newest themed run with a few of your best friends in 6 weeks or less. You don’t even have to take it seriously. If you want to just jog in a tutu to prove you can make it through a 5k then do it! Running can free your mind and your legs from cellulite.
- Yoga: I’m not going to go much into detail about yoga because it frustrates me a bit, but if your idea of a good time is to be zen, calm, and collected, try a yoga class. Or, get a little rebellious and try aerial yoga or hot yoga!
2. Charity: Helping others feels good. There are so many different charities that need help and could use someone who needs a mental happy place, that you could even overcommit yourself on good deeds. Regardless, you may find your calling in all that busyness.
3. Skills: What a way to counteract feeling like a failure, but succeeding in achieving a new skill. There are tons of unconventional ways to better yourself in an affordable manner such as:
- Learn a new language from an app, night class, or even community center
- Take a cake decorating class
- Take a cooking class (This could help in your next relationship BIG TIME!)
- Take Karate or Krav Maga (talk about learning to kick butt during your divorce!)
- etc. etc. etc…