So you’ve been through years of trying for a baby. You have changed your entire lifestyle. You have worked tirelessly to do everything you can to make sure that you’re as healthy as you can possibly be so that you can create the best eggs and environment for your baby to thrive from and in. Then you get the final blow. Your doctors advise you find someone else to carry your baby. So now, you have to find someone who you trust to carry your precious treasure that you’ve spent thousands of dollars to create/adopt. You have watched Baby Mama and you’re officially terrified. OMG, this woman is going to tinkle in my sink! You finally get to the point where you find someone ready and willing, and you have a good feeling about them. You have talked about the big issues when it comes to surrogacy, but what about the things that aren’t as commonly talked about? What about all the time you spent reading and researching. Remember when you learned how receipts contain BPA and you had flashbacks to when you blotted your lipstick on them? Then when you’re at Publix and they try to hand you your receipt you hiss at them and they think that you’re scared of COVID but in reality, you’re really terrified of the BPA and then you feel bad because they’ve got BPA all over their fingers and they don’t even know! (That just me?) Remember when you learned about all of the chemicals in your favorite hair product? Here are a few things that you need to consider today when drafting your surrogacy contract:
1. Travel: With COVID and Zika wreaking havoc on the world, we need to be very cognizant of where our surrogate is planning on traveling before and during the process. If it were you carrying your baby, you’d sacrifice most trips to keep that little one safe, but your surrogate may not think that these things are as big of a deal as you do. So, open the lines of communication and talk to them about their travel plans as well as their preventative measures. While you’re at it, also talk to them about travel in the last trimester as things become more imminent. You don’t want your surrogate in a state that’s not surrogacy friendly when she’s about to pop!
2. Vaccines: Speaking of prevention, let’s chat about vaccines. There’s an array of people feeling very antivaccine right now. We are not getting into the drama on that issue. Whether they’re anti COVID vaccine, Flu vaccine, or even anti Chicken Pox vaccine, you really need to discuss this issue with them as well as your Reproductive Endocrinologist. We never push people one way or the other because it’s everyone’s own individual choice (and we aren’t doctors!), but when someone else is carrying your baby, it’s something you need to discuss sooner rather than later.
3. Hair Dye and Nail Polish: I’ve been there. I changed all my Tupperware to glass. I changed my shampoo, my conditioner, my body wash, and I started using essential oils for perfume. Once you go to that place, there is no coming back. Okay, yes, occasionally you (I) will open a bag of Cheetos and have not one single care for what chemicals create that neon orange color you (I am) are eating. It’s different when it’s your unborn child and you know that he or she is subjected to the chemicals that your surrogate is subjected to. Are you okay with your surrogate getting her hair done after the first trimester or do you want her to deal with her new ombre hair look and wait until your baby is away from the chemicals at the salon?
These are just a few of things to consider when you’re thinking about your surrogacy agreement and journey. If you’re interested in finding out more things you should talk to your surrogate about before you too get too far into the surrogacy contract process, give us a call.