It’s often times that people who have been divorced want a second, third, or fifth chance at love. They’ve found someone else who loves them and their children. They want to move toward their new beginning without anything holding them back. They are very excited that they can finally move forward to build a life with someone, and they’re no longer mudslinging with their ex-spouse. They’re no longer tearing down what they’ve built. Everything is coming up roses until the ex-spouse realizes that the new spouse is putting down roots. Then drama is more prevalent than seersucker on a southern summer day. Once that new spouse begins asserting their rights over your children, your money, and your space, that ex-spouse no longer feels like being civil. This is all fine and dandy when the ex-spouse is the dramatic one. However, what happens when you have a type? What happens when you like crazy?
- New spouses often cause litigation. It’s not that they do anything in particular, unless you have one who is your “type” and decides to pick fights. Many times if your spouse is normal or nice, and your ex is less stable than Amanda Bynes, you’re going to end up back in court because your ex can’t fathom not having the ability to tell you what to do and when to do it. If your new spouse is right up in that psych ward with your ex, there’s a good chance no matter what you do to alleviate the drama or stress, you’ll still end up in court. You can do everything by the book, but you can’t fix crazy. You can’t stop crazy from creating a storm of litigation around you. Sometimes you just need a Judge to even out the playing field.
- Your new spouse will drive up your legal costs. If you are caught in a custody dispute, and your new spouse is on your contract as someone who can call and ask questions or give us facts about the case, that new spouse may be calling 3-4 times a day. They may call just to fuss about your ex. They may call about legitimate concerns. However, you have to realize that the new spouse has access to your legal account like he or she would have access to your bank account, and if that bank account could do something about the ex calling you at all hours of the night, they’d be sliding that debit card left and right to make it happen. Instead, they’re calling your lawyer to file frivolous motions, and giving them nonsensical facts to use at a later date.
- Your new spouse may ruin your case. Sometimes, you can only control so much. If your new spouse and your ex-spouse do not get along, there may be a situation where you have to break up a yelling match or even a fistfight. You can only control yourself, and, hopefully, sometimes your children. You can’t babysit an adult as well. If they’re posting on Facebook or Twitter during your case, there is a chance that you need to shut them down. You need an adult in your life. You do not need a liability. Before you decide to go back to court, make sure you sit down and have a long talk about the drama they thrive in and exactly what they will have to give up to keep you in their life as well.