From fairytales throughout history, the term stepparent has been used to torture, terrify, and
persuade children into thinking that the stepparent is someone to fear. Imagine if in all these fairytales the stepparent had embraced the children as their own, and adopted them. Cinderella wouldn’t have had to befriend vermin in order to create a dress. She wouldn’t have had to deal with her stupid midnight curfew. Her sisters would have been invited to the ball, and possibly the entire family could have lived at the palace with Cinderella after she won the prince’s heart (except Lucifer, he’s a jerk). The point is, if you recently married a parent who is essentially a single parent because the other parent has either abandoned their child or has already given up their rights, and you’re toying with the idea of becoming their parent legally, here’s a few reasons as to why that’s a great idea:
- It completes your family. Nothing says that you’re committed to your spouse than to take their children in as your own. You don’t have any legal obligation to do that which makes it that much more special when you do. Now the rest of the world will see the devotion to and the emotional bond to your stepchild that is now legally affirmed through this process. Please note that this still applies even when they’re being a spoiled little brat. No takes backsies!
- It gets rid of a negative stigma related to the term “step” in stepparent. As mentioned above, everyone knows that every single time the term stepparent is used in children’s stories, it is synonymous with “evil.” There are tons of theories behind that, but the outcome isn’t that great. It leads to children fearing some evil being taking their parent away. They don’t see that it could balance out their lives and make things better in the long run. What better way to prove to a child that you’re not taking anything away, but that you’re giving your unending love and affection to not only their parent but to them than by legally becoming their family? Diamonds aren’t forever, family (& adoption) is forever.
- It rewrites History. A family member of mine recently made a comment to me that she was upset she picked the wrong man to be the father of her children. Her children are wonderful, well behaved, beautiful children. Her ex? Well, let’s say he is a flaming piece of poo (yes, that’s legal jargon for deadbeat father). It broke my heart to hear her say that she was sorry for choosing him to be her kid’s father. She didn’t know that he’d be an awful dad who wouldn’t pay child support and would abuse her, but if she had known she would go back in time and find someone better, like her current husband. The good thing with stepparent adoption is that it does just that. Once a stepparent adopts their stepchild, it’s as if that child were always theirs. Legally, they are that child’s other parent and although it doesn’t erase the negative history, it does change history for the better for these children.
If you’re interested in a stepparent adoption, give us a call! 205-582-2832!